I was curious about where the Parental Advisory warning came from and who the people who thought it up were in the first place. Well here they are, don’t they look like a wholesome bunch? These are the women who want to shield their children from images and songs about sex and violence even though they all look like Alexis from Dynasty’s regular bitch slappin’ partners.
People are built to covet that which has been labeled as forbidden. There are examples of that going all the way back to the day that Eve was walking around Paradise basking in the light of eternal bliss and God’s everlasting approval and thought “yeah this is all great, but what I really want is a bellyful of that mangy looking forbidden fruit”. So if you want one surefire way to get kids to listen to certain songs that might not have even been a blip on their radars put them on a Big Bad List Of Naughty, which is exactly what Tipper Gore, better half of Al “Global Warming is bad” Gore, and her band of merry wives of politicians did. In 1985 they started The Parent Music Resource Center (PMRC) and put out a list of songs, known as the Fitlhy Fifteen that made them clutch their pearls and weep for the brutal attack on their delicate chidren’s angelic innocence and purity. They are also the ones who introduced the idea of a Parental Advisory: Explicit Content sticker, giving most Hip Hop and Heavy Metal artists something to strive for.
I don’t have anything against the Parental Advisory warning, because the artists don’t seem to mind, some even wear them as a badge of honor. I guess as long as parents still buy their younger children’s CDs they can decide whether they risk exposing their children to “the filth”. The thing that I can’t wrap my head around is the fact that these women actually believe that the sources of evil in their precious offspring’s life come from the music they listen to.
The PMRC are of the opinion that the increase in rape, drug use, teen suicide and pregnancy is due to the explicit nature of music. Ah, when in doubt turn to the usual suspects. We don’t need no stinkin’ scientific back up, by the powers of deduction we can clearly see that the culprit has to be music. It cannot be crappy parenting, bad education, an all consuming fear of Bin Laden and his minions, poverty, abuse, neglect, or any other of the numerous possible factors, it has to be music, cuz it’s right there in their rooms and all we have to do is throw it out and all is right in the world. If all the kids listened to the Carpenters there would be no crimes and we would live in harmony. Following their reasoning they’d all end up Boulimic but, oh well, at least they’re not pregnant and snorting speed with their raping biker boyfriends.
Here’s the list from 1985. Doesn’t it look like the ultimate great songs of the 80’s mix? I love the fact that they gave us the categories after the songs for our convenience:
1 Prince “Darling Nikki” Sex/Masturbation
2 Sheena Easton “Sugar Walls” Sex
3 Judas Priest “Eat Me Alive” Sex
4 Vanity “Strap on Robbie Baby” Sex
5 Mötley Crüe “Bastard” Violence
6 AC/DC “Let Me Put My Love into You” Sex
7 Twisted Sister “We’re Not Gonna Take It” Violence
8 Madonna “Dress You Up” Sex
9 W.A.S.P. “Animal (Fuck Like a Beast)” Sex/Language
10 Def Leppard “High ‘n’ Dry (Saturday Night)” Drug and Alcohol Use
11 Mercyful Fate “Into the Coven” Occult
12 Black Sabbath “Trashed” Drug and Alcohol Use
13 Mary Jane Girls “In My House” Sex
14 Venom “Possessed” Occult
15 Cyndi Lauper “She Bop” Sex/Masturbation
I didn’t even know that “We’re Not Gonna Take It” was that violent, I just thought it was about rebellious teens. Neither had I ever thought about the fact that Madonna’s “Dress You Up” was about sex. Songs that used to be just pretty ditties with a catchy chorus, are now scanned and scrutinzed for the dirty parts, so thank you PMRC for unlocking the inner perv in kids everywhere.
One of the concerned mothers of PMRC claims that “Much has changed since Elvis’ seemingly innocent times. Subtleties, suggestions, and innuendo have given way to overt expressions and descriptions of often violent sexual acts, drug taking, and flirtations with the occult.” There is absolutely no truth in this claim, there have always been songs that were clearly about sex, or violence and even drugs. Johnny Cash alone covered most of the things on the PMRC’s taboo list and The Dominoes 1950’s hit “Sixty Minute Man” is all but subtle about sex:
There’ll be fifteen minutes of kissin’
Then you’ll holler “Please don’t stop” (Don’t stop!)
There’ll be fifteen minutes of teasin’
Fifteen minutes of squeezin’
And fifteen minutes of blowin’ my top…
Elvis himself sang on “Baby Let’s Play House”: I’d rather see you dead little girl than to be with another man. It’s beautiful how innocent the delicate hint about jealousy driven murder in that good old song is, isn’t it?
Which makes me wonder if these women ever did listen to Rock ‘n Roll, the very term derived from an old slang term for sex. They probably had to divert their eyes when Elvis provocatively jiggled his pelvis and turn the channel when Little Richard sang about how Good Golly Miss Molly liked to ball. I shudder to think what the soundtrack of their lives must be like, Engelbert Humperdink is probably about as edgy as they can handle. Though he sang the song - made famous by Beavis and Butthead, called “Lesbian Seagull” and his last name is a bit racy, so we can scratch him off their soundtrack too. Poor Engelbert.
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